The period of December 21-23 is when “the shit” is supposed to happen. You all know what “the shit” is. The end of the world prophecy as based on the ancient Mayan calendar.
This Friday, December 21, in the late afternoon into the evening, the TV network FX will ease the pain of the last days of Earth’s existence. The 1998 movie ‘ ’ and 2009 movie‘2012’ will air. ‘Armageddon’ airs at 5:00pm; ‘2012’ airs at both 8:00pm and 11:30pm.
Depending on when “the shit” starts, FX might not get to air the entire film(s). Just the same, I suggest people just remain calm, eat popcorn, pizza, or whatever their favorite movie snack is, and have a few beers while watching these movies. I also suggest giving some beer to the kids too, if you want. It might calm their nerves. No, wait: most of the kids will be so engrossed in playing their video games that they probably won’t notice a thing happening around them until electric power is cut! Never mind. Save the beer for yourselves.
Now of course there are other “destruction of Earth” films around and I’ll bet TV networks or some local movie house will be showing them. In various places on this planet, “end-of-the-world” parties will be going on strong in somebody’s house or neighborhood, or in some pub or bar near you. With all the festivities, one might think it was New Year’s Eve! Many people will be having a grand old time drinking, smoking weed, getting shitfaced, and in plain sight, you’ll not only see people hugging and kissing passionately but also engaged in oral and coital sex. Yes, I mean people will be openly sucking and fucking! You’re bound to see at least lots of oral sex and…why not? Ha! Ha! Yeah, it will be sexual debauchery run amok! I’m not going to deny that this all sounds like fun to me! I told you long ago that unashamedly, I’m an extremely sexual person, so this would be right in line with my nature! In fact, it makes my dick hard just imagining all this sex going on! And nobody should have to be alone, at home, masturbating during those final days of the expected destruction of Earth – not with all the “suddenly available” pussy and ass being given up so freely! I say, get out that house, apartment, dorm or hotel room and go get laid! Sex takes your mind off things! Right? Guys, remember to have with you plenty of condoms….you know… in case the world does not end. You will thank me later for saving you – and your precious dick – from a life of sexually related regrets!
Meanwhile, somewhere else, will be people in their homes or gathered in some house of religion cowering in fear and/or praying to their Creator. Nothing at all wrong with that but…BORING! And let’s be very real: Tragically, expect there to be a few wackos who will use the “last days” to take some inhumane action against an innocent and helpless man, woman, child or animal. If you see this happen, please…kill the muthafucka! The world will be ending anyway so any laws governing acts of heroic vigilantism will be void. Just because the world is ending does not mean people or animals shouldn’t go out with dignity!
Whatever humanity chooses to do in the final hours, every minute should be a period of contentment for all. When or if “the shit” happens, it’ll be all over in a matter of mere minutes. However, there is ONE consolation: For the first time in Man’s history, EVERYBODY will be fucked at the same time, so smile!
See you in the after-earth life, fuckers!