I either live in a very violent city (Saginaw, MI) or the epitaph of my life is being written somewhere and maybe my time on this Earth is coming to an end. I know; it sounds morbid. But, while I would like to have the longest, healthiest, and prosperous life possible, I’ve never had any pretense about my mortality. To premise this post, let me first note that I’ve watched no violent television or movies in recent days. I’ve not read any books, papers or internet news depicting violence in that same time period. In fact, I just returned from a few days visit with family in my home city of Philadelphia (another violent city). Yet this morning, a mere hour ago, I woke from the worst dream I can ever remember having in years. I dreamt someone shot me, point-blank. In my dream, I was in an area surrounded by many people. It was dark for some reason. I recall all the human figures were like silhouettes; dark and faceless. I saw someone, a male figure, approach me. He pulled out his gun and shot me. I felt the thud of the bullet hit me hard in the center of my chest. I remember shouting out in pain but it wasn’t a loud shout. Although I knew I’d been shot, it really felt as if someone had playfully punched me in the chest. (In reality, a bullet shot is several times worse!) When the bullet hit me, I recall simply saying out loud, “Ohh, that hurts!” As I fell, I remember trying to reach for my cell phone to call for help. I remember thinking over and over, “I am NOT going to die this day! I am NOT going to die this day!” I kept repeating those same words as people just stood around me, watching. No one, not one person, made any attempt to assist me! I remember feeling drowsy, as my eyes started to close. Still, my closing eyes could see no one reaching down to help me….
I’m told it is good, on some therapeutic level, to record the dreams one gets during sleep. I am not a dream interpreter. However, most of my life, I have had many déjà vu dreams of the future. Days, weeks, sometimes months would pass before the actual happening of whatever it was I dreamt about would occur. At that moment, I’ve always stopped for a brief second and say to myself, “I’ve dreamt this! Déjà vu.” Fortunately, not all of my bad dreams of the future have come true (although I wish some of my GOOD dreams would come true). I can’t help but wonder what many of the weird dreams I’ve had over the course of my life really meant. Past dreams notwithstanding, I pray the dream I had last night was not one of some possible future and that it does NOT come true! Still, that particular dream begs the questions: Why was no one willing to help me in that most important moment of need? What did that dream mean, if anything? This inquiring mind wants to know!
Well…I could either ponder the meaning of this terrible dream or simply ignore it, move on with my life, and continue to hope for the long, healthy, and prosperous life I so desire.